I’m Mayor Bill
I’m de Blasio, Bill
And I want control of Capitol Hill
So while I’m out there campaigning, I’ve abandoned New York City
(Though my odds of a victory are looking pretty shitty)
To eat deep-fried crap in Iowa
For me they’ll vote, I pray that they will
‘Cause if not, then I’m still Mayor Bill
I’m Mayor Bill
And my podium will
At the CNN debate go unfilled
I claim I’m fresh and exciting and a true New York progressive
But the voters ain’t biting and my polling’s not impressive
I’ve got no support in Iowa
Bad polling may have slain Kirsten Gill
But today it won’t kill Mayor Bill
I’m Mayor Bill
A lame duck hunting thrills
‘Cause my job as New York Mayor’s a pill
So while the NYCHA is ailing and the subways are all stymied
Vision Zero is failing, and the cops are being slimy
I’ll be laying low in Iowa
I’ve got a lot of time I can kill
‘Cause I don’t want to be Mayor Bill
